1. Go to Google and type, "You know you're from (your city or state) when...." (hit "I'm feeling lucky")
2. Cut and paste the list.
3. Bold the items that apply to you.

For Calgary

- the temperature goes ABOVE minus 15 and you get excited.

• You measure distance in minutes, not miles.

• You can say “minus 30” without fainting.

• The local news reporters have been on the same station for so many years that you don’t remember a time when they weren’t there. (Darrel and Barb)

• You say “Yes, ma’am” and “Yes, sir” to your own parents.

• You call it “The Deerfoot”, you know what a Chinook arch is, and counting Flames car flags is a hobby.

• “Spring” is the grass being green for two weeks - then it’s brown...for the rest of the year.

• Directions include the direction to take on the Deerfoot.

• The rivalry between Calgary and Edmonton is a real issue – it is not just about the hockey and football teams.

• You have been known to go to the store for a Slurpee at minus 30.

• The speed limit on the Deerfoot is 100, you’re doing 115, and people are still passing you as if you were standing still.

• You know exactly who has been in your driveway by the tire tracks/footprints in the snow.

• You dread the Chinook for the headaches, but look forward to the next one when you are stuck waiting for a bus at minus 25.

• You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.

• You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit. And know you're still going to be dressed inappropriately at some point as the weather is not forecastable.

• You know that even though we just got 3 inches of snow that it won’t make good snowballs or snowmen because it’s too cold for the snow to stick together, but it will stick to the ground until the next Chinook

• You remember when you thought this was a big city.

• You fall asleep on the train and think that you will wake up at your stop because it’s the end of the line. Then you remember that they extended the line right after you miss your station.

• You know the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance in summer, and by distance and the wind chill factor in winter.

• Cold water comes out of both taps.

• You know that potholes are inevitable.

• You carry jumper cables in your car all year-round... for your OWN car.

• You have known someone who has had one belt buckle bigger than your fist.

• You know how to do the Ye-Haaaaaaa.

• You get the morning off work to attend the Stampede Parade (and some of you still get paid for the time off.)

• You attend a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelry, and your cowboy boots and Cowboy hat - no matter which gender you are.

• You go shopping at IKEA on a Saturday night for fun, not because you need or want to buy anything.

• You can wear a T-Shirt one day and the temperature can drop 30 degrees by that evening.

• You catch snowflakes on your tongue in winter, dance in the rain in summer or vice-versa, because you've seen both conditions in the opposite seasons.

• The Pastor can add a reference to the Flames into his/her sermons. (Especially if we make the playoffs, Go Flames Go!)

• Three generations of the same family sit together in worship.

• You see more Flames flags than Canadian flags.

• You know someone who ate the 72 oz steak and got it for free.

• You prefer Peter’s to McDonalds.  (Hell yes!)

• You’ve seen a wild animal in your backyard and you live miles inside the city limits.

• You know people with leather seats are just asking for it.

• You know where the nearest Brewster’s is.

• Your idea of the perfect summer afternoon involves rafting on the Bow with a six-pack and a dozen of your best friends.

• 45 minutes to work is the average... on a good day.

• On any given day, there's something someone's allergic to somewhere in the air.

• We have four geographical regions; how many do you have? And you know that if you don’t put the quadrant in the address your correspondence could end up just about anywhere.

• Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road". Your Lexus WILL get dirty.

• You drive a pickup truck because you want to.

• You know 4 seasons – almost winter, winter, still winter, and road works.

• You go to the gas station and there is a sign in the window that reads, “No Shoes, No Shirt, No Service!”

• Yes it's my truck, and no, I won't help you move!

• You go up the Tower for lunch on special occasions.

• You've swam in Sikome Lake, and not worried about the ickyness of it.

• You've walked through the screen on the patio door.

• You've sat in a traffic jam on the Deerfoot and when you got to the end of the crawl there was nothing to explain the jam, maybe just a stalled car on the shoulder.

• You remember watching Buckshot and Benny and wondered if they would mention your name on your birthday.

• You didn't have cable...you had CBC, CTV, and a bunch of static.

• School very rarely gets cancelled because of the weather. And you will sit on a bus for two hours in a blizzard just to be one of the 20 students who actually show up.

• The posted speed limits are just suggestions. Just don't get caught.

• You watch the fireworks from Scotsman's Hill.

• You’ve skated at Olympic Plaza.

• The Saddledome is "The Saddledome” or "The Dome”, not the Pengrowth Saddledome.

• You drive with the top down every chance you get.

• You state your destination by district as if the city was just a bunch of little towns sewn together.

• You know the nicknames for some of the districts and people understand where you mean when you use them. ie: The Hills - Foothills Industrial; The Belt - anywhere south of the tracks downtown and north of 17 AV; The Hood or the Ghetto - Forest Lawn; The Hood, or NE - Falconridge. The city evolves.

• Bike paths!

• Heritage Park!

• The Zoo!

• You've walked several blocks in sub-zero temperatures during a blizzard to go to the Dairy Queen for a Blizzard.

• You cheer for the Flames during hockey season, the Stamps during football season, and the biggest rowdiest rafter on the Bow in between.

• You remember exactly where you were when the Flames won THE cup. (Lord Stanley's Little Champagne Mug.) Ah, the Stanley Cup for all those who didn't get my reference.

• CKXL or CJAY? You had a preference and if it wasn't C-Jay then it isn't C-Jay now.

• You watched the Stamps trounce the Alouettes, even if you don't live here anymore. Yay, Calgary is home to the Grey Cup again. Now, to the boys with blades on their feet: Your turn.

• The first words you say to another human being in the morning are: Make mine a double double.

• You know that gunning it on ice to try to get going is only going to make the ice slippier.

• You remember when the child bus fare was 35 cents, yet you still had to trick the driver by feeding 20 cents in pennies in.

• You think pushing the button at the intersection half a dozen times will trick the device into thinking 6 people want to cross.

• You hit the button to heat the Dalhousie bus shelter even though you know it's pointless.

• You know how to navigate downtown without having to step outdoors. And if you don't you will want to when you learn how. It's freaking cold out there somedays.

• You've taken a nap in the Devonian Gardens.

• The +15 rocks!

• You drive Sarcee, just to admire the view.

• You just love to hear Calgary mentioned in a novel, or a narrative. Not about news or sports. Just to see the town's name randomly in print in someone else's story.

In regards to real life, I had a pen thrown at me at work today. Because I was 10 minutes late for a customer's appointment. Even though I had told him I was going to be late and offered to reschedule.

I also had minor surgery to remove the cyst in my neck. I get the stitches out tomorrow!


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