This week in the blog group the topic was “WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE? Based on a book I read about a girls unfinished life list when she died in an auto accident.”
I don’t really know what I want to do. Sure, there’s the standard. I want to get a good job, find a man, marry, have a kid. Other than that, I don’t really have any big goals.
I don’t really have any huge desire to go anywhere. I’m not like those people who want to see the Grand Canyon or something before they die. I don’t really care. Sure, I’d like to go to Japan, but I don’t really have any burning desire to go there.
I don’t have anyone I want to meet before I die. Sure, I’d love to meet some of my favourite voice actors, but if I don’t, I don’t really care.
I don’t want to play on a famous sport field, or go on an adventure or anything. I’m quite happy hanging out at home on my computer or spending time with my friends watching movies.
I guess the closest thing I have to a last wish is to finish a novel. I have about five started and I’d love to finish one. Just one. I’d be happy with just that. But even then, I don’t think I would be heartbroken if I was told I was going to die and I could finish writing. I like keeping my ideas to myself. In my head they can’t be criticised. No one can say that they’re bad or stupid or that I shouldn’t be writing. I’m not sure that I want to open them up to that.
So, I guess I’m just boring. I have no great aspirations or anything. I just want to enjoy life while I can and not worry about what I have to do before I die. I’d rather focus on the present than worry about the future. And sure, I do worry. But not in terms of “I’m going to die, what am I going to do?” but in terms of, what do I want to do with my life? Instead of thinking I’m going to die soon, I’d rather think that I’m going to live. There are tons of things I want to do while I’m alive, but nothing that I’d hate not being able to do. I guess I’m just not very driven.